Sweet Childhood

Every once in a while, I like to flip through old photo albums and watch those poor quality videos of my toddler self. It's quite an emotional experience.

Some of it is hilarious-Ridiculous dancing to the wind, staring at the ground in betrayal because it didn't cushion me when I landed on it, hiding all the return gifts because I didn't want to give those shiny purses away. (I look like an evil goblin in that picture)

There's one video where my hand is fractured. My mom is talking about how she's worried that my grandparents would be saddened if they knew. Little Priya then came up with a scheme. 

"Let's lie to them, then. We'll say that we are having a blast, there are no injuries, we are eating cake," I say, my voice swaying. "So they'll feel happy and we will suffer in secret," I declare with the most pained expression a child can have. 

 How did my young mind come up with such ideas? 

These captured memories make me teary too. It's bittersweet for all of us to look back on the distant past. Our present selves hold the knowledge of how everything played out and that tiny body seems so happily unaware. 

 Those days were blissful, weren't they? When we felt pure joy because we took life as it was. Our thirsty minds quickly drank up the world around us. Each discovery was exciting. I still remember standing in the balcony with my grandfather on a rainy night, in complete awe as he explained the water cycle to me.

Another favourite of mine is being told bed time stories. I'd get all cozy in my bed, cuddled up to a doll or two. Then my mom or grandmother would gently take me through a story. They were cute tales involving domestic animals and warmly lit homes. Soon my eyes would get heavy, and I'd fall asleep with a small smile. 

Our families created a cocoon of comfort for us. The sense of safety we still feel on looking back is all because of them. It's such an immense blessing to be born into the world and be wrapped with so much love. I don't mean to say it has been all rosy and perfect. Rather, they've been there holding our hands all through the rough road. And that is one of the biggest reasons to feel thankful.

So when I found myself mildly saddened to have grown up, I told myself that the sunnier side to this is appreciating the lovely days I've had and continue to receive. In fact, I can always choose to embody all those things I love about my kid self. The innocence, the zest for life, the playfulness and ability to have fun. Maybe I'll even bring back the adorable pigtails.

Might as well love life right now. Someday, this will turn into the memories that bubble up when our future selves reminisce about the good old days.